It's not easy for me, but the art of keeping your mouth shut is just as important as knowing how and when to speak. A lot of leadership literature today hinges on communication, and I don't mean to denigrate communication, but sometimes it's better just to keep your mouth shut.
A lot of leaders feel they need to add something to every conversation. Please kick this impulse in the teeth. There are many times that people just want you to listen. There are many times that you need to just listen.
Learn before you speak.
Though you may have something to add to the conversation, always having something to add to the conversation will get you a reputation that you don't want.
Equally important to a leader as speaking is listening. Communication without understanding doesn't happen. That's miscommunication; and if we feel the need to talk more than we listen, miscommunication is exactly what we're going to have.
As leaders, we are expected to be charismatic, witty, charming folks that liven up all conversation with our intellect, wisdom, and anecdotes. We can do those things to. There is a time and a place for that. More than that, though, is the need to understand before being understood. If we truly serve the people we lead, our job is to listen to them more than we talk at them.
In all honesty the more we listen and understand other people, the more poignant and guided can our words be. Hastily speaking we miss important aspects of a situation, or have a less than full understanding of a person. A leader can't afford misunderstanding; sometimes there's only one opportunity to lead correctly and wisely.
I'm not suggesting a prohibition on talking, but I am suggesting that we not only learn to listen better, but find ways to teach our leadership students to listen more carefully and thoroughly. Doing so will be a long haul, because listening to others without interjecting our own opinion and beliefs is not an art that is being taught by today's culture.
Your overtures into this disicipline are going to need to be planned, intentional, and plentiful. We are constantly encouraged to give our view on something, no matter how little of it we know, and so as teachers we will have to be contantly vigilant to expunge that tendency in our students as much as we can.
Remember, a servant listens, and then acts. It is a tyrant that dominates a conversation or a debate without understanding the situation or the person.
Learn to listen. Listen. Model listening. Raise listeners.
Training Tomorrow's Leaders Today,
Matt
Showing posts with label listening. Show all posts
Showing posts with label listening. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Monday, February 8, 2010
Increase Your Wisdom
I was reading in Proverbs the other day and this little tidbit stuck out at me. “The wise man listens, and increases wisdom.” I love this.
In our world, to be “the man” we’re expected to talk. We’re expected to have all of the right answers, and know everything in our field (and a host of others).
The Bible sees wisdom in a different way. Take a close look at that verse. First of all, the person who listens is already wise. Second, when he listens, his wisdom increases.
The next time you are out with a group of friends, at a meeting with fellow professionals, or are just talking to another person at church or work, listen.
It’s amazing what you learn when you aren’t trying to insert your own opinion. Listening has two great side effects. First, as the Bible says, you gain in wisdom. Second, people like to be listened to. You’ll make somebody’s day if you actually listen to them.
Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to listen, especially if you disagree with the person you are listening to. Discipline yourself. Hear everyone out, no matter what their opinion. That’s how you learn. That’s how you grow.
Wisdom doesn’t figure much into today’s world. Unfortunately, to get ahead it seems that listening to others isn’t as important as telling them how it’s done. The wise leader listens before speaking, and they learn from what the other person is saying.
As we teach young people to be leaders, we should make sure that we are teaching them to listen. There are plenty of people all around them more than willing to tell them how they should be doing things. They can start practicing their listening skills right now.
What are some important things you have learned while listening to others?
Training Tomorrow’s Leaders Today,
Matt
In our world, to be “the man” we’re expected to talk. We’re expected to have all of the right answers, and know everything in our field (and a host of others).
The Bible sees wisdom in a different way. Take a close look at that verse. First of all, the person who listens is already wise. Second, when he listens, his wisdom increases.
The next time you are out with a group of friends, at a meeting with fellow professionals, or are just talking to another person at church or work, listen.
It’s amazing what you learn when you aren’t trying to insert your own opinion. Listening has two great side effects. First, as the Bible says, you gain in wisdom. Second, people like to be listened to. You’ll make somebody’s day if you actually listen to them.
Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to listen, especially if you disagree with the person you are listening to. Discipline yourself. Hear everyone out, no matter what their opinion. That’s how you learn. That’s how you grow.
Wisdom doesn’t figure much into today’s world. Unfortunately, to get ahead it seems that listening to others isn’t as important as telling them how it’s done. The wise leader listens before speaking, and they learn from what the other person is saying.
As we teach young people to be leaders, we should make sure that we are teaching them to listen. There are plenty of people all around them more than willing to tell them how they should be doing things. They can start practicing their listening skills right now.
What are some important things you have learned while listening to others?
Training Tomorrow’s Leaders Today,
Matt
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